Bakweri Marriage And Traditional Wedding

As indicated by Mola Mbua Ndoko the conventional methodology of securing a spouse as was recommended by Bakweri seniors over 200 years prior includes three stages: Bakweri Marriage And Traditional Wedding

As indicated by Mola Mbua Ndoko the conventional methodology of securing a spouse as was recommended by Bakweri seniors over 200 years prior includes three stages:

1. The endorsement of the guardians, especially the moms of the life partners choose.

2. Fixing of the marriage contract (efeyo).

3. The wedding.

Stage One: The Engagement (Ewanda)

A female child was locked in any event, when she was as yet in her mom’s belly. It was an oral agreement between old buddies. The agreement was regularized at the appointed time at the suitable time. The most common way of concluding that a commitment (Ewanda) would now be able to happen is delayed since the families concerned need time to unobtrusively research each another. Matters to be examined include: richness, history of sicknesses particular with specific families, practices of malicious black magic, for example, nyongo.

At the point when the guardians of a kid or a kid himself are keen on wedding a young lady, the dad of the kid sends a messenger to impart his aim to the guardians of the young lady. The messenger would normally be a nearby individual from the family: an auntie, an uncle, or a cousin to the kid. In any event, when the guardians of the young lady consider a solicitation as overwhelming their answer would regularly take a structure like this:

“Much thanks to you. We also will give the matter due thought”.

You have complimented us (e-jeni isofe vato).

Give us an opportunity to think about your solicitation”.

Following a couple of months the messenger would get back to the guardians of the young lady to discover their response. In the event that the group of the young lady acknowledges the proposition their answer would take a structure like this:

“yaa ! inyo ndi joo-ngo”.

In a real sense:

“We are here pausing and anticipating your further response to the circumstance”.

As later as 60-70 years prior a commitment (ewanda) was a simply private service including around ten people, four to five delegates of the kid aiming to wed and around five agents of the young lady to be hitched. Agents were ordinarily close individuals from the families concerned: the guardians of the kid and the young lady, aunties, uncles, maternal nieces. Ewanda happens at the home of the guardians of the young lady. Ewanda is an oral agreement where the delegates of the kid affirm their expectation to have their kid hitched to the young lady concerned. The group of the kid ordinarily presents an ewanda gift to the young lady. Assuming that the young lady is too modest to even think about gathering the agents of the groom choose, the young lady’s mom would get the gift in the interest of her girl.

After a commitment function has occurred the guardians of the kid might start to pay endowment in portions to the guardians of the young lady. The primary parent to get the main portion of endowment should be the mother of the young lady. Reason. It has been understood that a marriage that happens in disobedience of dissatisfaction with regards to the mother of the young lady or the mother of the kid is by and large ill-fated to disappointment. The primary portion of endowment that the mother of the young lady gets is a youthful female smooth looking goat that has not begun to convey. Acknowledgment of the goat by a mother is a further blessing of the marriage by the mother.

Stage Two: Sealing of the marriage contract (efeyo)

Efeyo is a public service. There are two kinds of efeyo, specifically “efeyo yi itote”, and efeyo ya mwese.

(I). Efeyo yi Itote – A the entire night service in which formal evaluation and compromise of settlement that the dad of the lady of the hour to be has so far got. More settlement portions might in any case be paid during the efeyo service. The finish of an efeyo is the conventional fixing of a marriage contract. A marriage contract is fixed with the conventional sharing of a ngowa ye efeyo to all male observers to an efeyo service. The ngowa is relied upon to meet customary prerequisites. The ngowa should be either a female or an emasculated ngowa a maata.

Efeyo contracts used to be oral. For a situation where there is a composed agreement the signatories to the agreement would typically be the guardians of the companions choose. Marriage contracts are customarily and socially undertakings saved for taking care of by the guardians of the mates choose.

Note: Dowry got by the mother is a special arrangement. It’s anything but a public function. The share used to be around one fourth of the settlement that the dad to the young lady gets.

At the fruitful finish of an efeyo the young lady/lady to be hitched practically turns into the spouse choose of his kid/man.

Efeyo yi Itote happens at the premises of the dad of the husband to be. Before beginning of business the visitors, that is, the dad of the young lady to be hitched and his escort must be engaged with an average size ngowa and other rich food and a sensible amount of palm wine. The ngowa should as a matter of first importance be displayed to an authorize agent of the dad of the young lady to be hitched prior to cooking begins. The delegate has power to either acknowledge the ngowa or reject it if the ngowa misses the mark concerning ordinary prerequisites. The dad of the young lady to be hitched may correspondingly dismiss the ngowa ye efeyo if the ngowa doesn’t satisfy ordinary guidelines.

e-ngowa ye efeyo is shared into three parcels.

1. Parcel one goes to the dad of the young lady to be hitched and his family. Custom necessitates that the chest of the ngowa ought to be given to the maternal uncle of the young lady to be hitched.

2. Part two goes to the dad of the spouse choose and individuals from his company

3. Part three is held for all male observers to the function.

Business initiates before long sunset. It is a lethargic the entire night issue, accentuated discontinuously with rich lofty social professions pertinent to efeyo. The professions are regularly made by agents of the dad of the groom choose and the dad of the young lady to be hitched. Nobody is in a rush. It is an event to brag with distortions and to exhibit how the prompt male relatives of the mates choose are knowledgeable with social brilliant qualities in efeyo and marriage undertakings overall.

Share is as goats. The dad of the young lady to be hitched may demand upwards of 1,000 (ikoli) goats or more. Custom doesn’t permit that total endowment be paid upon the arrival of the efeyo. The equilibrium of endowment might be paid in portions at the appropriate time. Exploiting the present circumstance the dad of the husband to be after conference with individuals from his escort at last proudly acknowledges quite a few goats that his companion requires. At that point the main stage in the function is the show, the acknowledgment, the butcher and the sharing of e-ngowa ye efeyo. A marriage agreement, oral or composed, is fixed with the butcher and sharing of e-ngowa ye efeyo.

The sharing of e-ngowa ye efeyo is appointed to somebody who knows to whom uncommon pieces of the ngowa should go. For example, the digestive system of the ngowa is a programmed additional offer that goes to the dad of the groom choose. There is no status known as “intruder” regarding having a portion of e-ngowa ye efeyo. Each male observer (adolescent, grown-up. older) to an efeyo has a customary/social right to a proper portion of the ngowa. Ladies are not relied upon to take part in the long all night social efeyo service. Not being dynamic members or dynamic observers to the service ladies are not qualified for formal portions of e-ngowa ye efeyo. Ladies anyway have a reasonable right to “taste” the food before it is served to the dad of the lady of the hour choose and his company.

Stage Three – The wedding

Before the wedding happens, the guardians of the husband choose will most importantly introduce another smooth looking female goat that has not yet begun to convey to the mother of the lady choose. The goat is known as “e-mboli etimba we ewongo”: Literally, the goat that is relied upon to utilize or lie/rest on the couch (ewongo) on which the lady of the hour choose used to rest.

The Wedding: Abduction or formal.

(a) Abduction. The dad of the lady of the hour choose is relied upon to give her girl considerable wedding gifts. At the point when the dad can’t, or is hesitant to make the gifts or when he comes up short on progressive events to regard dates fixed for the wedding it is a discretionary sign to the group of the groom choose that they might steal the lady of the hour choose. Since by custom a lady choose is practically a spouse after an efeyo kidnapping is admissible.

(b) A proper wedding. The Bride is accompanied to her marital home by a company of around five to seven properly certify, regarded and effectively wedded ladies, joined by a few resilient men to convey the Bride on their shoulders when the Bride and her escort are going to enter the town of the Bridegroom. A lady is relied upon to go in the evening. Traveling to her marital home thusly initiates before long dusk.

One of the wedding gifts that a dad is relied upon to provide for her little girl is an attractive mwaaka mo mboli (a maimed goat or a female goat). Fat from the paunch of the goat is scoured on the hair of the lady, while the meat of the goat shapes part of the bubbled food that the lady of the hour takes with her to her wedding home.

When journeying starts the escort begins to sing as loud as possible “moombi small, small ! Moombi small ! The singing is formal notification to the town local area that the Bride is withdrawing. Singing initiates again at whatever point the Bride and her escort are going through a town. Then, at that point, comes the ceremony and situation of the conventional section of the Bride and her company into the town of the Bridegroom. The Bride presently solidly conveyed high on the shoulders of one of the men in the company is enlivened and rearranged with whimsical head ties wrapped on her arms and her head. She would typically wear a full-length kaava. The company then, at that point, escalates singing of the old style wedding melody:

“Moombi small, small ! Moombi small (hurrah, view the Bride is coming).

Moombi small, small ! Moombi small.

o-maasa Moombi mo Ngondo, mo-mama ja (Bridegroom